Conservative Case for a Coup
Real authoritarianism has never been tried in America
Via Free Beacon
The 💥Views of This Author💥 are purely his own.
Decadence is a helluva drug, and America is addicted. That includes you, dear reader, and everyone you know. Irredeemably possessed of self-infatuation. Pining for the perfect tweet. Smothered in selfie filters. Hanging brain on conference calls. Emotionally invested in "elections" and their "results." Who "won" this time? Who cares? It's time for an intervention.
Most addicts need to hit rock bottom before they seek help. Well, America suffered eight years under a failed president (B. Hussein Obama) and almost picked Hillary Clinton to succeed him. If that isn't rock bottom, I don't know what is. Just look at yourself, America. Do you feel strong?
Don't get me started on Donald Trump. The Western democracies haven't elected a real strongman since Margaret Thatcher, and Trump is no exception.
Is Trump better than the libs? It's a fair question. Is gonorrhea better than syphilis? (I wouldn't know.) I'd rather focus on the fact that our country has been under assault from communists ... and I'm not just talking about Joe Biden. By refusing to take military action in response to the China plague, America has entered the "let's try fentanyl" phase of our addiction to decadence.
There's no cure for this addiction, only treatment. The first step is admitting we have a problem, and seeking help. Next, we need to stop behaving so irresponsibly. Holding an election in the middle of a plague? Voting by mail? Turning a blind eye to foreign meddling by renegade Swedes? It's a cry for help.
The third step, obviously, is a military coup. Yes, I'm serious. Don't like it? Grow a pair. Now is the worst possible time to undergo a regime change. Trump is on the verge of curing the China virus, and we still haven't figured out what the hell is going on. It's time for the non-Deep State elements of the military establishment to step in and seize power—temporarily, indefinitely, whatever.
Don't—and I can't stress this enough—get your panties in a bunch. Just think of it as "mandatory rehab,"
Real authoritarianism has never been tried in America. What is the downside to giving it a chance? It might very well be the case that a few (intelligently implemented) authoritarian reform measures—indefinite suspension of elections, hyper-militarization, Guantanamo for journalists, etc.—will usher in a golden age of political cohesion.
The agenda practically writes itself. Jail the journos, obviously, and engineer a prisoner exchange for Chinese Uighurs. Bomb the power plants and factories to combat climate change. Start making stuff in America again. Exert our dominion over the world again. Is that too much to ask? Full Article / Parody By Biff Diddle @Free Beacon
